Fw: 25 Signs you are a grownup


>1. Your house plants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
>
>2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
>
>3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
>
>4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
>
>5. You hear your favorite song on an elevator.
>
>6. You watch the Weather Channel.
>
>7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of hook up and break up.
>
>8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
>
>9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."
>
>10. You're the one calling the police because those damn kids next
>door won't turn down the stereo.
>
>11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
>
>12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
>
>13. Your car insurance goes down and your payments go up.
>
>14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonalds leftovers.
>
>15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
>
>16. You no longer take naps from noon to 6 PM.
>
>17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of
>one.
>
>18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset,
>rather than settle your stomach.
>
>19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms
>and pregnancy tests.
>
>20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good stuff."
>
>21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
>
>22. "I just can't drink the way I used to," replaces, "I'm never
>going to drink that much again."
>
>23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real
>work.
>
>24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.
>
>25. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that
>doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
>

I'm older than shit.

NO shit, you dont look it TT

Well, we tigers are exceptionally well-groomed. And besides, I've been able to preserve my girlish laughter. LOL

Hmm... if TT is older than shit, that puts me in the dust age range. Oh, TT.. being a feline, I feel you'd like to know what happened to my 2 Persians. I took them to have them groomed at the vets leaving word to the vets "just do whatever you think in order to get all the knots out. You have free reign." I picked them up after work, let them out of their carriers, and they look like a small French Poodle with a Maine.

ROFL! Miniature Persian lions! *dying with laughter* I used to have a Maine Coon, and we had to shave her constantly. She loved it. She'd go out on the grass and roll around and primp and preen as if to say, "Look! See how pretty I am? Who's a pretty kee-cat!?"


(and please, no off-color jokes about shaving pussies) er... Too late.

Einstein -- You have confirmed my worst fears! I grew up at age 18, by almost every point in the list except having sex in twin beds [ANYTHING is better than carpet burn!] and the part about not being able to drink the way I used to. I truly know better nowadays than to knock back shot glasses of 100 proof bonded with rednecks til they tumble off their barstools, even if I still can navigate on two legs and was even better at it 'way back when

Thanks a mil for 24 chuckles and a belly laugh!

Luce

I believe that "shit" tirade was a bit by George Carlin. He's the shit

Ten Tigers, I have a 10 year-old Maine Coon, named Fritz. He's white and orange and long-haired. Maybe I'll shave him next summber, I didn't know that it could be done. He's so cool. Everyone who sees him says something like, "Holy SHIT, that's the biggest cat I've ever seen!" It's mostly hair.

Maine Coons get knots in their hair, and after awhile, the skin gets twisted into it, and they turn into hard nodules. If Fritz isn't having that problem, I'd probably leave him alone. Cats *can* get sunburned and their hair helps prevent that, so maybe instead of shaving him down to the skin, you might be better off to give him a haircut. Good luck. Maine Coons are the sweetest, most intelligent, most personable cats... Wonderful creatures.

We have a cat that is half Maine Coon her fur is a mess. I started to cut it away but she barely will lets up hold her let alone do anything to her. She is a big cat too, about 15 pounds or so with all claws. She can be a real pain in the ass to deal with. Im going to try to shave her next summer one way or another.

Atheist, if her fur is that bad, you might let the vet do it. It will probably cost around $100, but he will give her a mild anesthetic and check her out for any skin infections and stuff like that when he takes care of the knots. Good luck.

-Ten shorthaired Tigers

Atheist - just for reference, the cost for getting my 2 cats groomed (shaved) at my vets was $88.00 plust another $50.00 for the anesthetics (divide that by 2 since I have 2 cats). In short, they have to tranquilize my cats to do it. I have noticed that the after affects of this on the cats is they become more loving and playful. I guess it's the relief from all that weight of hair being removed. Oh yea, my cats are strictly indoor babies.

BTW TT: Since I told them they were setting a fashion trend, my two cats are prancing around the house and no longer pouting.

LOL, Kipper. I'm sure your kitties feel so much better. Good for you.

TT, Fritz just started getting those big hard knots in his hair a few years ago. I just cut them out with scisors. It's hard to get down to the bottom, and I don't want to cut him. He lets me do it though and he loves getting brushed. He is totally scared of the vacuum cleaner though, so he might need drugs at the vets to get shaved.

I agree with what you said about Maine Coons. So charismatic!

At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor, and a calculator.

Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement which has struck terror into the lives of many for generations. He was immediately arrested for carrying............

weapons of math instruction.