Quotes Archive 2003

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zaphod
Posts: 434
Joined: Sat Apr 20, 2002 7:23 pm
Location: Pittsburgh,

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Post by zaphod » Thu Oct 30, 2003 5:33 am

Out of the list of the following items, identify the group of people you would normally associate with possessing that item, using the following groups.
A. Your military
B. Your police
C. Your church


1. Police scanners (one dozen)
2. Titanium vaults (three)
3. Searchlights (eight)
4. Razor wire (1000 yards)
5. Chainlink fence (1000 yards)
6. Night vision goggles (6 sets)
7. Motion sensing alarms (twenty)
8. Security cameras (one hundred)
9. .45 ACP pistols (ten)
10. Vistiril (100 capsules)
11. Real Estate (600 acres)
12. Paper, goldenrod (1000 sheets)
13. Some sort of rules (any)


hmmmm?

jasonc
Posts: 392
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 1:20 am
Location: PA

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Post by jasonc » Thu Oct 30, 2003 10:44 am

Zaph, at least Scientologists can now feel extra safe from the SPs.

~atheist
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2004 3:26 am

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Post by ~atheist » Thu Oct 30, 2003 5:06 pm

AE that was just wrong. haha
I think I will let the cat keep it tangled coat until next spring. Last year we called her a turtle cat because her hair on her back had made almost a shell. It took about an hour over a couple of days to get that off. She was not overly cooperitive but I got it done without any blood spilling. Well hers at least.

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Thu Oct 30, 2003 8:41 pm

And those long gashes in your forearms will eventually heal up just fine, Atheist. LOL

~atheist
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2004 3:26 am

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Post by ~atheist » Thu Oct 30, 2003 9:55 pm

haha
When she finally got away I had been holding her between my legs with her butt by my knees. She had wiggled out of the towel I had over her and bit my thigh. It is amazing how fast you can move with the right motivation.

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Thu Oct 30, 2003 10:14 pm

LOL! I never cease to be amazed at how fast cats are, too. My two kitties were sleeping atop of the sofa one morning, and I had some housework, so I crept over and plugged the vacuum cleaner in. When I turned it on, the big orange one leapt 6' into the air, came down, ran over to the little black one with her fur standing out straight, bit him on the shoulder and then bolted up the stairs and ended up at the other end of the house, all in the space of about half a second. The little black cat, who is not particuarly bothered by the vacuum cleaner, just sat there looking around like, "WTF was THAT all about???" LOL

jasonc
Posts: 392
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 1:20 am
Location: PA

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Post by jasonc » Fri Oct 31, 2003 12:57 am

Do any of "yuns" cats watch tv. I was always perplexed why my Maine Coon did not watch tv. When another cat appeared on the tv, I would point his direction to the tv, but he would not seem to give any notice.

A few weeks ago, I saw on the news that only "slow/retarted" cats can watch tv. It has something to do with their brain's process speed and how the tv flicks faster than the human eye can pick up.

Hopefully, this saves someone from buying one of those cute, but ridiculous "bird/bug" videos for cats.

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Fri Oct 31, 2003 2:35 am

My cats will occasionally bat at the screen, but once they realize that it's "outside the glass," they lose all interest. As a matter of fact, the only thing they're interested in is FOOD. Heh...

jasonc
Posts: 392
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 1:20 am
Location: PA

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Post by jasonc » Fri Oct 31, 2003 10:04 am

Besides Food, my cat Fritz, is interested in staying warm on my lap and shitting. He'll always give me a "meowerow" whenever he needs to do one of the three.

As far as "batting" goes, Fritz loves to dip his paw in my fishbowl, containing a betta, Mr. Marley, because his fins look like natty dreads.

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Fri Oct 31, 2003 1:49 pm

LOL! Mine are still only about 8 months old, so they tear through the house like they're being chased by Clinton with a cigar, pounce on each other, and hunt the big ol' mothras that come flapping in when I open the front door. Crazy-assed cats... Gotta love 'em. :) -TT

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Fri Oct 31, 2003 1:50 pm

LOL! Mine are still only about 8 months old, so they tear through the house like they're being chased by Clinton with a cigar, pounce on each other, and hunt the big ol' mothras that come flapping in when I open the front door. Crazy-assed cats... Gotta love 'em. :) -TT

jasonc
Posts: 392
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 1:20 am
Location: PA

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Post by jasonc » Fri Oct 31, 2003 2:49 pm

Oh yeah, Freedom, I hear ya. They are quite the acrobats when they are young. The first few years of Fritz's life, he would jump on top of the refridgerator, which was about 6'8" high! That's quite a serious high jump!

Now that he's 10 years old, he can only jump up to the ironing board, one of his resting spots. I've had many different cats growing up, but for sure, Maine Coons are the coolest!

All the meows, all the poses, all the love....for the last 5 years, I've been so "in love" with my cat, that I've been considering taxiderming him when he croaks.

Since being single, I've considered him to be my best friend, as many would consider their dog to be. I've had 2 collies growing up, one sable like Lassie, and one black, both around the same level of charisma, but less than Fritz. (of course they did way more tricks_)....but it's really weird....

My cat is so friendly and so lovable...I feel like one of those evil dudes from a James Bond movie or Inspector Gadget cartoon, whose face is not shown, only his hand petting his cat is shown. Fritz sits in my lap for a neck scratch at least 3 times a day.

Anyway, in my experience of having cats over the years, Maine Coons are the best. Hands down...also kinda cool, Fritz only likes being touched by me.....blah blah blah, enough with the catty blog, I'm drunk.

(Incidentally, my first cat, I named "Roastbeef" at the age of 3, and her nickname was "Muppet." Somehow, she ended up getting gangrene on her rear leg and the vet amputated it, so I had a 3-legged cat running around my house growing up. Miscavidge would be proud. That's the thing about guys who are under 5'4", they are usually considered "three-legged." In other words, they seem to be big-dicked, but mainly relative to their feminine physique. I am proud, however, to be be a 6 foot, 6 incher. I've never had a chick not moan. Oh man, I'm being a dumbass, so what, I'm having fun typing while drunk. Very strange, no bodily or mental pains.

I'm gonna be a BT for Halloween, thus being an asshole to others who ask, as they'll have an MU, then commit an overt and blow, according to LRH tech. ....Then, I'll have more booze for myself....I'll wait for January to go to AA :( Too numb for now. Too happy to abstain. No hangovers, I dirnk too much water before I go to bet.....blog no more...blech....end quote. ?

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Fri Oct 31, 2003 4:17 pm

LOL! A great romp through Jason's consciousness. I wish you the very best in January, by the way. I myself, am a Jeepaholic, and a proud member of Jeepaholics Anonymous. (And no, I'm not looking for a cure, but if anyone has money they'd like to donate to the continued building of my Jeep, that would be GREAT!) Anyway, back to work. After all, I have a habit to support! ;)

jasonc
Posts: 392
Joined: Tue Sep 09, 2003 1:20 am
Location: PA

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Post by jasonc » Fri Oct 31, 2003 5:57 pm

My very first car was a Jeep.

A 1987 wrangler, 6 cylinder, chrome all around, big tires, KC highlights, winch, 2 tops, and a PA system! Very fun.

freedom_man
Posts: 2766
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2002 2:32 pm

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Post by freedom_man » Fri Oct 31, 2003 6:03 pm

NICE! I'm not much on chrome, but I'm crazy about my '99. It's only a 4-cyl, but I've never had anything that's more fun to drive. :)

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