Hello all, I'd like to share my dream. Im not an ex-sci and have only participated in the activism minimally. But anyway, I had a REALLY creepy dream a few months ago when I was eating, living and sleeping Scientology related information (to be equipt with facts when raiding)

Anyway here it goes:

Im in a GIANT warehouse or manufacturing factory, Im laying on my back from what I can tell as I am staring at the ceiling... but Im moving. I realise that Im on a conveyor belt. I think to myself (semi-lucid) "WTF, am I a robot???" I look to the left and right of me and see assembly line machines... I am being built. Piece by piece on an assembly line... Im am AFRAID now! I look at the machinery building me... I am TERRIFIED now, as I realise it isnt machinery!!! Its PEOPLE!!! People, moving with the precise movements of an assembly line machine doing its single purpose. And these people have a blank stare, they arent thinking, have no emotion I can see, they are only doing what they are programmed to do and nothing else. I realise these robot-esque people are wearing SEA ORG uniforms... I am feeling like they are, I am paranoid and want to get out any way possible, but I cant.

Then, to my HORROR (an anxiety I could NOT put into words)... I come to the end of the assembly line... from my low perspective, I am looking up at L. Ron Hubbard (looking SOOO sinister). He is looking down at me smiling... Then, my perspective changes. I am seeing from LRH's perspective looking down on myself...

I realise what I really was... An E-METER... coming off the assembly line...

I woke up, sweating and feeling strange... I didnt go back to sleep that night.

Thanks for that, ntelekt1.

Now you have me wondering if there are dream triggers that L. Ron built into his writings and lectures.

No prob Weiber, was that freaky or what!!!? Ive been interested in reading these dream posts and figured mine was worth a mention.

Regarding built in triggers... I'd say no, (imho)the triggers are built in our brains and those triggeres are stress, anxiety, etc, etc...

I stayed up all that night trying to analyze and make sense of whyI had the dream... I think it was a manifestation of how I think Scientologist might feel while in Scientology. I felt anxiety, stress, and a feeling of being trapped, feelings of comformity (How Id think a Scientologist would feel if he/she had just begun to wake up... or like Im Neo, and Im just noticing the matrix for what it was. FAKE and a prison of the mind)...

IMO: the factory represented Scientology the organization... as it was a huge intimidating corporate thing that has no purpose other than producing the product its make to produce no matter what... (and just like when a machine breaks down, the manufactoring process remains constant... kinda like when their is a questionable death in Co$, they brush it under the rug and its business as usual)

the machines are the Sea Org members... who have conformed to a single task and will only do that task (clearing the planet). They have become automated and NOT unique... They are just machines doing what they are programmed to do... Even though they are unaware of the finish product. (kinda like how Tory Magoo said she was creating anonymous accounts, then someone else would come in and take it from there... Tory never knew the finish product... just her tiny piece in its production)

The conveyor belt was... The road to happiness??? Id say the road to sadness. As I felt I could not get off this ride! I was stuck in this system. And along the way the sea org/Sceintologist were just doing what they were programmed to do: nudge me along till I reach the end of the road whether I liked it or not.

And what happens at the end? I reach the final truth of the "factory" (Scientology). That Its all for L. Ron's own amusment!!!

And then, looking at myself and seeing that Im an E meter??? I felt that I had become artificial... that I wasnt me anymore, I was programmed. A machine... I was BRAINWASHED!!!
---------------------------------------------------------

Again, I had this dream when I was deep into reading all things Scientology... Specifically, all its thought control-geared policies and the questionable deaths... I was most interested to understand how a cult can pull in more victims, and furthermore, what it takes to keep them in!

The insight this thread gives is facinating! Thank you all for reading.

I've had a couple of "minor" scientology dreams lately. One I cannot remember the content. In the other I was a public registrar. I found myself going through the motions of indicating a "ruin" to a young woman, telling her scientology could help with that and routing her onto a basic "TRs" course.

All the while I was going through the motions I wanted to not be doing that because I knew the trap I was putting her in. The most disturbing thing about this, for me, is that I felt completely comfortable with doing what I was doing.

Though I can't remember the content of the other dream it was very similar to the one I just described.

I once dreamed that I had a loaded revolver with Hitler and LRH in my sights and couldnt decide which one was worse. I woke up before I made up my mind.

I tought I was doing better but crashed again. I have a recurrent dream even if the setting might be somehow different its always the same thing. I'm back in the SO not by choice. My last dream was so bad I woke up screaming. I was looking for one of my children. I couldnt find her. My other kid told me he wanted to stay there. I had lost everything I had work for and felt completely trapped. When I woke up screaming it was because I felt so desperate and in my dream I tought it wasnt a dream than convinced myself it was once and scream for it to be a dream
crazy eh?
I have found this on the internet. Steve Hassan contributed to it.
I have been wondering about my anxiety disorder. Now I know without a doubt where its coming from. I have the profile to a T. Come from an acoholic family (my father), joined a cult and the rest, well, you know.

PTSD is very common for those that joined a cult and left. The recurrent dream is one symptom of it. Anxiety is the most common disorder of ex cult members.

anyway, here is the link. I didnt want to write here first but figured it might help some lurkers if they wonder what the fuck is happening to them like it did to me. And still does.

Whitedove

http://www.freedomofmind.com/resourcece ... -cuddy.htm

I'm not interested to constantly relived what happened to me than. I have done it for years and I cant say it did not help me. But at this point, I feel like a broken record but this might be of help to some people. I know the nightmare of living with anxiety.
And its OK to take medication if you feel you are going to completely lose it that you have lost control over your mind and body. I have to say that caue I KNOW how scientology convinced people that psychiatry is evil. Its not. Believe me.

Do what you want with this info.

Whitedove, if you haven't read Trauma and Recovery yet, I recommend that you do read it.

I still get these things but I stopped writing them down as they are a lot milder than they used to be and I tend to forget them quickly. One day I woke up sure I had had a scientology dream about three rem cycles earlier but with no idea what it was about other than there was that feeling left over from it. Another thing that bothers me is in these things I am often a staff member and it is often Wednesday night or Thursday morning. Feh!

I don't remember much of last night's dream. There was a room in the "org" that had been emptied of its folders and there was quite a bit of space there. Later on two or three of us were sent out to find someone to give over money. I walked a couple of blocks away from the "org" and looked up to see a person fall from a great height and go splat on the ground just a few yards away from me. That was disturbing. Next thing there are all these emergency workers on the scene and I'm still trying to figure out where I'm going to get some money for the "org." I think I found that even more disturbing.

Even in their milder form I would very much like to stop having these dreams.

Wow. First Scientology dream in a very long time occurred this past weekend. I was on staff (left staff 30 years ago). I was thinking, "How did this happen again." I knew I did not belong there and felt trapped. I was back in the courseroom of the mission I was an exec at back in the 70's. Luckily it was at that point that my alarm woke me up from the nightmare. It's funny that when I have the occasional dream that I am back on staff, there is always a feeling of gloom that goes along with it. There is never a good feeling or a "let's clear this planet" attitude. It is always a bad dream. Go figure!

" I knew I did not belong there and felt trapped."

"It's funny that when I have the occasional dream that I am back on staff, there is always a feeling of gloom that goes along with it. There is never a good feeling or a "let's clear this planet" attitude. It is always a bad dream."

SeeYaBye, those are the exact same feelings and responses I get to my scientology dreams. It's how I knew I had had one even though I couldn't remember it at all. I knew from the feeling I had when I woke up.

when I have a dream about Scientology, it is also always about being on staff and it is the ideal stuff for nightmares.-feelings of being trapped. of being so dumb for signing again even though I know how horrid it was, no time for anything else, being chronically tired and the likes -

The difference is that now the dreams are less frequent and in the last three dreams I had managed to tell them that being on staff was a nightmare and not for me and I also told them that I am a protester and a contributor on massage boards and I just got up and left the building. The last part of the dream felt really good.

Opter

I had another one last night. It's funny when you're in a scientology building, never mind the picture of Hubbard on all the walls, but you know right away. There's this utilitarian sterility to the spaces and although they keep their places white-glove clean there's a gray griminess to everything.

In this dream I was on staff, didn't want to be there, held a high position in the "org," did essentially nothing, false reported the statistics and dreaded being found out. At one point I was taken outside the building with another staff member to go and do something for the "org." As soon as we went out the front door I turned to the person and told them I was no longer a "scientologist," that I was opposed to what scientology was doing and that there should be a picket showing up soon, at which point, as if on cue, a group of picketers showed up.

Not much of a dream, but these things leave me feeling debilitated for the rest of the day and dreading my next sleep. That's still the way it is even though the dreams are a hundred times milder than they were a year ago.

Wieber,

I know how you feel! I have them too. I hope they go away someday. unfortunately, I have asked people who have been out 10 plus more years than I, and they still have dreams and still have anger towards COS. Wild.

My dreams are mostly about the RPF, sometimes about CC Int. The RPF ones are bad. The CC Int ones usually end up being comical.

Oh, great, Bea! So I have a lifetime full of scientology dreams to look forward to in my future. I have found that writing them down and posting them tended to diminish their frequency and their impact. I got through almost a year without having such dreams and then they started coming back, so I'm going back to writing them down and posting them again.

I'm also scouting about for books on dreams and therapy related to dreams. There might just be a way to banish the damn things once and for all and if there is I hope I find it. In the meantime I hope you'll put up with me writing them down and posting them.

Bea, I sympathize with you having dreams about the rehabilitation project force and I feel sad that you had to go through that. As a lower "org" staff member there was no chance of going to the rehabilitation project force so I can only sympathize vicariously. It churns me up reading about the rehabilitation project force. I'm sure the memory of it does worse things to you. I hope you reach a point where the impact of your memories and dreams of the rehabilitation project force comes close to being nullified.

I had yet another scientology dream.

In this one I was a staff member in a very large "class five org." One of the anomalies about this particular "org" is that all the walls were white and there were no posters, pictures, charts or anything on the walls.

The place was crowded with staff but no "public." I was posted in "qual" and doing "staff hatting." I think that's inaccurate because that particular "post" is in "division one" not "division five."

There was a woman who was my "senior" who kept telling me what was involved and what I needed to do. People in sea organization uniforms kept showing up and adding to the crowd but still no "public."

I finally mustered up my courage and said to the woman who was my "senior," 'I'm not one of you. I'm an SP.' Man! The building emptied quickly. They all ran. I grabbed the woman who was my "senior" and held her from running away while I read to her from Bare Faced Messiah.

As I came into wakefulness from this dream I felt resentment towards scientology for taking up so much of my dream time.