In July, 2000, I was on ARS talking with the critics. This was done in the
privacy of my own home. At the time I thought I was trying to
"Handle" ARS, and calm the critics down. I think deep in my heart I had
spoken to enough Critics who had asked me hard questions, both in person for
OSA---and On the Battlefield Earth Yahoo Message Board, where I was as
"Get Real 101". I'd managed to get this message board shut down. However,
once it was...I found there was something missing from my life. Something SO
fresh, so NEW, so challenging.
I had remembered those feelings from back before I got into Scientology,
when I was a free speech advocate. I wanted more of it.
Thus, I went onto ARS!

As I began on ARS, I named myself "Magoo".
Since I was trying to be anonomous, I went by "We" vs "I". Thus, in this
e-mail, you will hear me say, "We". This was one of the key e-mails I had
with Andreas that was a HUGE crack in my Scio/Truman Show. After reading
what he had to say, I sat here in my dining room, crying for about two or
three hours, non-stop.

I realized here that what Andreas says WAS how I was when I got into
Scientology. However, then, in the year 2000, I had spent years lying about
OT 7, trying to support Scientology, saying it was "great" ...when
truthfully it was horrible. Each of the basic things he speaks of I had, and
then had lost, I felt. I felt totally shut off, after 7 years on OT 7.

I cannot say thank you enough to my friend,
Andreas, for all that he has done for me. There is a great book called, "The
Power of One".
Andreas is a great example of that.

I hope this communication *might* also help another soul trapped as I was.
Here ya go:

ubj: Re: Soooooooooooooo`
Date: 7/14/00 1:30:03 PM Pacific Daylight Time
From: heldal@online.no (Andreas Heldal-Lund - www.xenu.net)
To: Mistmagoo55@aol.com

Hi Magoo,

At 11:12 14.07.00, you wrote:
>Andy.....
>
>We gotta tell you.....it has been kind of an amazing trip.....being on
>ARS....and getting to know you.

ARS is like most busy newsgroup a hotchpotch of ordinary
people and like life it is an amazing trip. When you give
everybody a megaphone it can be noisy. Looking through the
crap and the nonsense in the world there is a lot of
wisdom and sanity out there. A lot.

>Years ago we briefly saw your Web page...and have on and off seen your
>promo's for it. But it has been good hearing from you.
>
>You seem like a good man. Not that we feel what you are doing is good,

Thank you. I do truly believe I'm a good guy and I do believe
it is important to live as you speak and speak what you
believe. I might be wrong, even in important issues and
opinions that I'm deeply convinced on, but hey, I'm just one
guy and people should not follow me or anybody else on their
opinions alone. They should, like me, make up their own
opinions even though they could err.

>but we
>can tell it is your quest, and one you have put alot of time into. Where
>does it go from here? What is your actual goal?

This is like asking for my meaning of life. I care when I
see injustice. I don't like lies and fraud. I'm especially
sensitive to lies and deceit that is obvious but few dare
to oppose or reveal because there is a threat connected to
doing so. I saw that when I investigated CoS. I'm not saying
and I'm not of the opinion that all Scientologists are bad,
on the contrary, I believe they are good people with the best
intention. Just like me. But they are (in my opinion)
misguided and wasting their good efforts and time on
something very different than they believe. Another danger
with cults like CoS is that it can make otherwise good people
do unethical acts arguing that "the goal sanctify the
means" or "to the greater good of all".

From here I continue my journey of life, one day at the time,
facing each new challenge using my brain trying my best to
act and choose according to my ethical standards. Doing like
Kant suggested: make all your actions into a law that could
be followed by all and use others as the goal and not the mean.

I can't save the earth, I can only do my little part. And at
the end of the journey I hope I can think back at my life with
a good conscience knowing it wasn't all in vain and that I
did the best all things considering. That's my "goal".

>So enough of THAT>..how are you? Busy, we know. We too. So is it morning
>there now? It is 2:30 in the night/am here.....and we are listening to
Andrea
>Bocelli as we type. Nice.

Without my music life would have been empty.

>So....take care, and do write and tell us more. We have read your Web
>site...and it does tell a lot. PHEW! So what DO you do in that huge
building?

In what huge building?

Take care.


Best wishes,
Andreas Heldal-Lund, Nunsteinvegen 9, N-4056 Tananger, Norway
Pho: +47 88 00 66 66 Fax: 90 32 35 46 E-mail: heldal@online.no
home.sol.no/~spirous www.xenu.net www.hedning.no/hedning
---------------------------------------------------------------
"If anyone can show me, and prove to me, that I am wrong in
thought or deed, I will gladly change. I seek the truth, which
never yet hurt anybody. It is only persistence in self-delusion
and ignorance which does harm." -- Marcus Aurelius
---------------------------------------------------------------


----------------------- Headers --------------------------------

Thank you, Tory. I'd like to see more of the posts between you and Andreas. What worked for you, may work for others, like you have said.

Lanai...

Sadly when I first left, I had NO clue that Scientology or OSA would do the Fair Game *crap* that they do. I left, not even considering they would come into my home, strip it of many things.
I KNOW OSA came and stripped my computer, as my husband didn't even know how to turn one on.

I'm quite certain Mr. Bill Yaude, Class 8, OT 7, Senior C/S and staff member at the Enhancement Center in Sherman Oaks, Ca as well as the I/C of the OSA INT TOP SECRET INTERNET MAFIA OT volunteers...came over and stripped it.
Thus, most of my posts that I had saved, were gone. I just found an old tape..with this one on it. WE'll see if I can find more.

Glad you liked it. That's why I posted it. I thought some others *might* be helped by it, and it's also historical for those who were in on my waking up

What a wild ride~~~

My best

Tory/Magoo~dancing in the moonlight~

Looking forward to your finding more.

I can't recall "Fair Game" being used where I
was at - although, I had read it. So, when I
left I was not particularly fearful of being
on the receiving end of "Fair Game". However,
when I make posts here I sometimes get a fealing
of fear about this.

Best regards,
Programmer Guy

Well,anything can happen but what I've noticed is that they target people who really do a lot of critical stuff like picket.

I have been out of CofS and have been criticizing them quite a bit on several forums for 3 years and only had one small thing happen that I cannot prove was those guys but that I think probably was.

People who go to the press, picket, or are thought to persuade others from staying in CofS would,or who've sued,started to sue, acted like they might sue, IMO, be targetted far more.

Not to say they wouldn't mess with someone who just posted, it just would be less likely and to a lesser degree.

There probably are exceptions to what I've said, but still, after 5 and a half years messing with this stuff I think I sorta kinda have a pretty good idea.

Not saying to not be careful. Do! But I think the real full tilt boogie gonna getcha type stuff's thrown more at the more public type figures, to varying degrees.

Also,it wouldn't matter how nice the Org was if they were really pissed. Because my org didn't give two farts in a windstorm if I posted to a.r.s. but when OSA got a wild hair about it, then things changed. OSA made the Org do the things they did.

But, again, it depends on how much one pisses them off. Ya know?

If I had done something like what you say, way
back when I was "on-lines" AND someone there
could identify me there definitely would have
been some ethics action. However, I never
saw any "Fair Game" type stuff.

PG: Neither did I...and I volunteered with OSA, for 20 years! So keep in mind, it ~isn't~something many people "See".

That's all part of their tactics: "WE? Doing
~anything~ bad"??? Well,they've done a great job of showing their Fair Game activities, esp on ARS.

My best,

Tory/Magoo!

PS: That is Sooooooooooooooo Amazing to me to re-read what Andreas said to me, as I was still posting as "We and they".

Too much

prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

T

Tory:
Ohh... I wasn't denying fair game activity
in general. I will take your word for it.

PG: Don't take my word for it....Go read their hate page:
http://www.religiousfreedomwatch.com

It's their hate page about us, and you can go read their lies, and then ask me the truth. In that alone, you'll see how they alter things.

Even my photo there they had to doctor up, so I look worse than I do. Sick, really.

Check it out...there's four PAGES of lies about me alone, as well as many others.

Tory/Magoo!

Hi Tory!
I couldnt find you on there page!?

Look under their darling heading/Black PR:

"Anti-religious Extremists". I've never been, nor will I ever be anti-religious. I also am not an extremist. I tell the truth, and they hate that.

They've doctored that photo, to make me look worst (how pathetic is THAT?). They lie about me on each page, over and over.

In essence...that IS Fair Game, in action, today.
Hubbard: "You can lie, cheat, steal, destroy them utterly". DUH!~ The ONLY reason they cannot destroy people utterly is thanks to this Internet and some very brave souls.

Tory/Magoo!

Ok, Now I saw it!
What a bunch of crap! I dont think there was one line that was true.
Poor bastards.
Well we can at least be glad to be out!

Take care!