What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Aug 29, 2016 1:36 pm

The next speaker was a communications engineer hired by CoS on temporary basis to establish satellite links between its branches located in different countries.

The engineer said, " I have been here for 10 months, my contract expires in 2 months. I took a basic course in Dianetics and a basic course in Scientology, then decided to learn more about Scientology on my own. I bought several Ron books and acquired plenty of HCOBs and Policy Letters.

As I understand, the OT folk have certain abilities, but they are not allowed to discuss their powers. But I found references to their abilities in the books, policy letters and HCOBs. I started thinking about having some of these magical abilities.

Suppose, I will gain an ability to exteriorize. But it is useless to me unless I work as a spy for our country, or spy on my unfaithful wife whom I do not have.

Ability to go back in time is very dangerous because you can mess up the future badly, as several sci-fi writers have noted.

Telepathy is good if you want to make living by using it in a circus, but I am no circus performer.

People with telekinetic abilities can telekinetically move small objects such as pens, lighters and other stuff; it is not like they can use this skill to build houses, roads and tunnels.

The only useful ability for me is teleportation, I can use it to go to work or to rob a jewelry store.

But you do not know in advance what kind of OT power you will get, it could be just a waste of money on OT courses."

"What about as OT ability to make money?" I said.

"This ability is not specific, there is plenty of billionaires who never heard about Scientology," said the engineer.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Aug 29, 2016 1:38 pm

Demented Founder wrote:The next speaker was a communications engineer hired by CoS on temporary basis to establish satellite links between its branches located in different countries.

The engineer said, " I have been here for 10 months, my contract expires in 2 months. I took a basic course in Dianetics and a basic course in Scientology, then decided to learn more about Scientology on my own. I bought several Ron books and acquired plenty of HCOBs and Policy Letters.

As I understand, the OT folk have certain abilities, but they are not allowed to discuss their powers. But I found references to their abilities in the books, policy letters and HCOBs. I started thinking about having some of these magical abilities.

Suppose, I will gain an ability to exteriorize. But it is useless to me unless I work as a spy for our country, or spy on my unfaithful wife whom I do not have.

Ability to go back in time is very dangerous because you can mess up the future badly, as several sci-fi writers have noted.

Telepathy is good if you want to make living by using it in a circus, but I am no circus performer.

People with telekinetic abilities can telekinetically move small objects such as pens, lighters and other stuff; it is not like they can use this skill to build houses, roads and tunnels.

The only useful ability for me is teleportation, I can use it to go to work or to rob a jewelry store.

But you do not know in advance what kind of OT power you will get, it could be just a waste of money on OT courses."

"What about an OT ability to make money?" I said.

"This ability is not specific, there is plenty of billionaires who never heard about Scientology," said the engineer.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Wed Sep 07, 2016 1:18 pm

To my surprise, the next speaker was my friend whose nickname was Mr. Handsome. "Hello, Handsome," I said. "I am not as good looking as you are, but I am not a bad looking dude, either.," said Mr. Handsome.

Then he continued, " I took couple of basic courses, and was seriously thinking about going up the Bridge. Then I came across a Policy Letter saying that sex is the most disgusting thing for a thetan. I'm an actor slash model, I dated a lot of girls, which comes with the territory. This was a red flag for me. At first I thought that Ron was a virgin. But afterwards I learned that he was married three times.' Ron didn't keep his dick in a freezer, and neither will I,' I thought," said Mr. Handsome.

"Are you sure that he was married three times?" said Smart Alec.

"I know that Ron's first-born son's name was L. Ron Hubbard Junior," I said.

"Yes, LRH was married three times," said Norman.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Sep 12, 2016 1:36 pm

The last speaker, Noah, worked for the dame advertising firm that Marvin did, he was an accountant.

Noah said, "I changed several religions including Scientology. I had a strict Baptist upbringing, my father was a pastor. My parents got divorced when I was 14; my Mom got remarried when I was 15. I liked my step-father. He told me once, "Choose a religion that you can have fun with; otherwise, you are screwed!"

When I was 18, I joined the Unification Church. Pastor Moon was a jerk, as I found out 5 months later. He was giving orders to everyone, not just to the staff. I didn't like it, but decided to stay for a while. But then I learned that Moon chooses spouses for his followers. "No one can tell me whom I should marry," I thought, and left the Church.

After that I joined a reformed Jewish Synagogue. It wasn't bad at all, I stayed with them for 2 years and even became fluent in Hebrew. But then I decided to move on and find a more exotic religion., which I did when I joined Hare Krishna,

But I stayed with them for 3 months only because I didn't like the work schedule -- you wake up at 4:00 AM and chant 'Hare Krishna' until 8:00 AM, then you have breakfast, and after that go to an airport or a railroad station to recruit new followers. That was too burdensome for me.

But I wasn't done with Hinduism yet -- I joined a less radical group and begun studying their religion."

TO BE CONTINUED.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Wed Sep 21, 2016 1:30 pm

Noah continued, "To learn more about Hinduism, I moved to India a begun attending their religious school, such schools are called ashrans. The Hinduism ceremonies and festivals are very colorful, and I was fascinated by what I saw. But after 6 months in ashran I begun studying the philosophy of Hinduism. The first thing that I learned was this -- nothing in this world is real, the whole universe is an illusion. 'How would I know that the supreme gods. Brahma, Krishna and Rama, are not an illusion?' I said. 'God Krishna will break the illusion for you,' said the guru (teacher) 'But breaking of the grand-illusion could also be an illusion,' I said. 'You do not have enough faith in Krishna,' he said. 'I do not believe in foolish things,' I said. The next day I was on an airplane heading back to the USA.
After my return to California I became briefly involved with Christian Science, then I became a Scientologist."

"Why did you leave Christian Science?' I said. "They use the word 'science', but none of them has even an undergraduate degree in science or engineering," said Noah.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Sep 26, 2016 1:27 pm

Noah continued. " At first Scientology was fun. I liked selling book 1 copies and getting personal info from the girls who were majority of my buyers, I even dated two of them. I earned my way to Class V level by selling books, and begun taking the Bridge courses. I got bored to death pretty soon, although I liked Dianetics. But the courses contained a lot of data that had no relation to Dianetics, so I begun hating them. The worst part were the clay demos. Nevertheless, I got to the Level 5, and decided to sell more books to get to Level 8.

But they said I should go OT. 'I do not have money to do that,' I told the reg. 'Take a loan,' he said. 'And how I will pay for the loan?' I said. 'You pay it with your ass,' he said and begun laughing as if it was funny. 'I have a better idea. You want to make commissions off me, it means that you need money. Use your own ass to make that money,' I said. Suddenly he stopped laughing. 'I can declare you an SP for making this comment,' he said. 'Go ahead, I'm leaving the Church,' I said, and I left that day.

"You could have complained to the Ethics Officer about his remark," said Smart Alec. "I suppose, I could. but by that time I got so bored with the non-Dianetics stuff that I felt like leaving,' said Noah.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Oct 03, 2016 3:53 pm

"What is your religion now?" I said. "I am a Kabala student," said Noah. "Are you an ultraorthodox Jew?" I said. "No. They are not the only ones who believe in Kabala, although the major Jewish denomination reject it, which shows how stupid they are, " said Noah. "Your leader is a former ultraorthodox Jew, isn't he?" I said "Yes, he is He thinks that Kabala should be open to everyone, not just to the Hasidim," said Noah.

"How long you have been studying Kabala?" I said. "For 8 years now, and I'm planning to study it for the rest of my life," said Noah.

"I heard you have celebrities in your group," I said. "Yes. Our biggest celebrity is Madonna, although she told us to call her by her Jewish name, Ester," said Noah. "She is bigger than Travolta, " I said (at that time I didn't know that Tom Cruise was also studying Scientology).

"Our Founder is the reincarnation of Buddha. Can you say the same about your leader?" said Smart Alec. "Our leader is an ordinary man with extraordinary knowledge. But he is not the highest person in our society; that would be God of The Old Testament," said Noah. "Can't beat that, " I said.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Tue Oct 11, 2016 6:55 pm

"In your opinion, who are more powerful -- the OTs or the Kabala followers?" I said.

"The OT powers are kept in secret, aren't they? Perhaps, there are none. But the Kabala achievements are well-known and recorded. Take the Golem story, for example -- a lot of people observed it," said Noah.

"What is Golem?" said Smart Alec. "In Scientology terminology, it is a doll body, it was made out of clay. The purpose of its creation was to protect the medieval Jews living in Chechoslovakia from anti-Semetic attacks," I said.

"There are also stories about the Kabala adepts who could turn stones into ashes, " said Noah.

"Are there other stories?" said a small and skinny man. "Some Kabala adepts could fly, they are depicted in the paintings by a famous Jewish artist, Mark Shagal, " said Noah.

"An OT 15 can create a universe, " said Smart Alec. "Presumably, Ron had reached that level. But did he create a universe?" said Noah.

"I'm sure he is creating it right now. He might even invite us to live there, " I said.

The irony was lost on Smart Alec, she said , "I wish I could move to Ron's universe."
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Wed Oct 19, 2016 1:39 pm

Wise Owl joined the conversation. He was declared an SP twice, and twice had an amnesty. He was a member of a society of high IQ people (my IQ was 12 points above his IQ, but I was not interested in high IQ societies).

"LRH wrote that there are several universes," said Wise Owl, and looked at Norman. "That's right. I even remember the number of one of the HCOBs saying that, " said Norman.

"But this seems to suggest that even if all implants installed in this universe are neutralized, a person might not reach the highest OT level known as Cleared Theta Clear," said Wise Owl. "Indeed, LRH considered such possibility, he even wrote that further OT auditing might be needed to neutralized the implants picked up in other universes," said Norman.

"How many there are universes?" I said. "Infinite number. But this doesn't necessarily mean that you lived in all of them, " said Norman. "But some people lived in all universes, so they will never become truly free," said Wise Owl.

"Any way of telling how many universes one had lived in?" said Smart Alec, she looked deeply troubled. "I do not know, " said Norman. "We need more data, " said Smart Owl.

But we never got more data -- at that moment a CMO member entered the auditorium and said, " You have to wrap up this seminar, we need the auditorium for a Scientology conference."
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Oct 24, 2016 1:42 pm

This is the story of a smart person who fleeced CoS; I'll call him Bob.

After receiving an associate degree in computer programming Bob begun a work as a web designer at a small company. It was a low-salary job, he was making approximately 30 K a year.

Bob's hobby was hacking, he was hoping to put skills to good use one day.

To be a successful hacker ne doesn't have to write his own hacking software, there is plenty of hacking tools on the Internet, most of them are available for free.

Bob's favorite hacking tool was Satan, it was the best hacking tool at that time. The Satan developers were so-called white hackers, they developed their product to help good guys to detect vulnerabilities of client companies. Unfortunately, Satan became popular among the black hackers as well..

Bob used Satan to hack into the Walmart network. But he couldn't use the stolen credit card numbers because he realized that such illegal usage was unfair to the small guy. However, he doesn't feel the same about stealing money from a vicious cult.

Bob hacked into computer networks of several cults including Scientology. At first he planned to steal money from the Unification Church. But this particular institution is based in South Korea, which created linguistic difficulties for Bob. Then he turned to CoS.

TO BE CINTINUED.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Oct 31, 2016 1:38 pm

At first Bob thought about stealing money from the rich CoS donors and the WISE clients. But then he came up with even better idea. In order to put his idea to a good us,e Bob needed to learn a lot about Scientology; to do that he signed for the Bridge courses.

Bob didn't have enough money to pay for the courses, so he joined the CoS program of selling Dianetics book to the general public. Bob didn't make regular sales, he just gave out Dianetics books for free. it took him about three weeks to complete the task.

Bob lost some money. But he restored his savings by stealing about $3,000 from the rich Scientology donors who were using corporate credit cards to make donations to the church. As Bob predicted, no one noticed that $500 were missing from each corporate account (Bob selected 6 donors, he took $500 from each of them).

Then Bob moved to the next stage of his plan. He appropriated phone numbers and e-mail addresses of the Scientologists who took courses at CoS from the CoS database.

After that Bob moved to the next phase of his carefully designed plan. He stole about $10,000 from the next batch of the rich Scientology donors; this was his last theft.

TO BE CONTINUED.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Nov 07, 2016 2:43 pm

Bib used the money to buy printing equipment. It took him a while to learn to use the equipment; he also begun taking the Bridge courses at a local Org.

Bob got to level 5, and decided that he had enough knowledge about Scientology to carry out his plan.

The first book that Bob printed was Battlefield Earth. In a series of e-mails to the active Scientologists Bob offered copies of the book at half price.

The promotional e-mails looked like the ones coming from CoS, customers could use credit cards and checks to buy the books. "The Scientology bookstore" webpage was connected to the official Scientology website (being a web designer, Bob knew a lot of things that ordinary people do not know). Of

Of course, the credit card money was streaming to Bob's pocket. The checks were directed to a PO Box located in the vicinity of Gold Base.

Bob didn't use credit card numbers for other than book sales, he was not stealing money from unsuspecting Scientologists; instead, he was delivering them services in the form of the cheap books.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Nov 14, 2016 2:26 pm

Slowly but steadily the list of LRH books offered to the public Scientologists grew; the most popular ones were A History of Man, Philadelphia Doctorate Course, and all volumes of Mission Earth.

Bob had even bigger plans; to realize them he thought that he needed a BS in Marketing (not from CoS, of course, but a real world degree). He earned his BS in Marketing by taking online courses offered by George Washington University.

The online GW University courses cover a wide range of topics (economics, Law, engineering, science, marketing, etc); they are considered to be the best online courses. Bob was a good student, he earned first BS and then MS in Marketing in just 3 years. The courses themselves are inexpensive, they cost only 1/3 of regular price.

By the time of completion of courses Bob's publishing company prospered, he was also selling non-Scientology books on cooking and home improvement. But LRH books remained his major source of income. Needless to say, Bob quit his web designer job.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Mon Nov 21, 2016 2:25 pm

Bob used the LRH persona to do a celebrity marketing, he learned the technique in one of his online courses.

There is an HCOB saying that Sea Org members should use odorless soap. Bob used this HCOB for marketing purposes.

Public Scientologists received "emails from Gold Base" offering them to buy so-called LRH Soap. The aforementioned HCOB was in the email attachment. There was also HCOB in that attachment with was a fake; it presented the list of soap ingredients "chosen by LRH".

There is plenty of brands of odorless soap on the market. Bob chose the cheapest brand, and re-packaged it, which was easy for him to do because he owned a publishing company. All he had to do is to print new labels, stick them to the soap boxes and mail the product to public Scientologists interested in the LRH Soap. The soap was an instant success, and a source of steady income for Bob.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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Re: What Would You Say to a Lurking Scientologist?

Post by Demented Founder » Thu Dec 01, 2016 2:29 pm

LRH Soap was a financial boon. Shortly after its introduction Bob used an HCOB about rice & beans to promote a new product called Sea Org Diet. This time Bob used a different approach -- instead of choosing the cheapest brand he chose the most delicious one (he tasted 19 brands before he chose the best tasting one).

Sea Org Diet also became a hit.

After that Bob begun selling vitamins used for Purification Rundown, he marketed them as ones suitable for everyday use. In a fake HCOB produced by Bob Hubbard wrote, "These vitamins will prepare you for Dianetics and OT auditing."

But another HCOB about the vitamins usage for Purification Rundown was authentic, the recipients were getting it in an email attachment along with the fake one.
"Cuando el pene de Xenu es adentro de mi culo, estoy inmenso feliz. Eso es manera de que Saentologia funciona. Voy a chingar todos mis aprentizes"
L. Ron Hubbard, Mi Vida Secreta.

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