Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

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Wieber
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Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Wieber » Wed Oct 30, 2013 8:28 pm

A theme line, or slogan, is a terse statement placed underneath a business or product name.

An example of this is Coca Cola's "It's the real thing."

Scientology uses theme lines, too. Here's an example. "The only game in where everyone wins."

I think it would be fun, and helpful for Scientology, if we were to suggest new theme lines, or slogans, for Scientology.

And just in case you think this is covert hostility, let me just say there is nothing covert about my hostility toward Scientology. However, I will admit to this being joking and degrading. We haven't had a new thread of that nature for some time and I think it's about time for one, or several - start one.

Here's my first suggestion.

SCIENTOLOGY
At war with the rest of the world since 1954


I'm sure you can do much better than that.
“Think wrongly if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.”
Doris Lessing

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Entheta You
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Entheta You » Thu Oct 31, 2013 12:16 am

"There's something happening here.
What it is ain't exactly clear."

Scientology:
Over 20 million served!
50,000 Cleared in 59 Years!
Keep those stats up!

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Wieber
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Wieber » Thu Oct 31, 2013 1:09 am

SCIENTOLOGY
Give us all your money. We'll take your life.
“Think wrongly if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.”
Doris Lessing

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bubbler
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by bubbler » Thu Oct 31, 2013 2:52 am

"Carpet Town USA...
Carpet Town USA...
Carpet Towwwnnn USAAAY!
Scientology!"

:flower:

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by bparker230 » Thu Oct 31, 2013 4:45 am

SCIENTOLOGY
Clear Your Mind...AND Your Bank Account!

SCIENTOLOGY
Free Yourself!...By Becoming Our Slave!

SCIENTOLOGY
Total Freedom Is Just A Second Mortgage Away!

SCIENTOLOGY
Got Space Cooties?

SCIENTOLOGY
Our Help Is Yours....Our Harm Is Your Fault!

I better stop now. I could go on and on.....

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Wieber
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Wieber » Thu Oct 31, 2013 7:58 am

SCIENTOLOGY
Got a close relationship? Scientology can handle that.
“Think wrongly if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.”
Doris Lessing

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Demented LRH
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Demented LRH » Thu Oct 31, 2013 2:01 pm

Scientology: The biggest bullshit of 20-th century
“This OT shit is driving me insane. On a positive side, I laugh a lot these days because I’m at a funny farm.”
L. Ron Hubbard

L. Ron Hubbard era un maestro de masturbacion fisica y mental.

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by bparker230 » Thu Oct 31, 2013 4:37 pm

Okay, "round two" on this one...(I am SO fucking J&D!)

SCIENTOLOGY
If You Don't Like It, You're an SP!

SCIENTOLOGY
Spiritial Freedom Is Not Cheap!

SCIENTOLOGY
The Few, The Proud, The Broke and Brainwashed

SCIENTOLOGY
If Your Mother Doesn't Like It, Disconnect From Her!

SCIENTOLOGY
Just Give Us Your Fucking Money

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by heyjupiter » Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:55 pm

SCIENTOLOGY

Say Goodbye To Love- they could play that Carpenters song on their recruitment ads.

Or how about slogan borrowed and adapted from Mel Gibsons Braveheart movie:
We may take your lives, and we will most certainly take your freedom.
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Wieber
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Wieber » Fri Nov 01, 2013 6:38 am

heyjupiter wrote:SCIENTOLOGY

Say Goodbye To Love- they could play that Carpenters song on their recruitment ads.

Or how about slogan borrowed and adapted from Mel Gibsons Braveheart movie:
We may take your lives, and we will most certainly take your freedom.
Image

SCIENTOLOGY
They'll never take our freedom 'cause Scientology already took it
“Think wrongly if you please, but in all cases think for yourself.”
Doris Lessing

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by spacecootie » Fri Nov 01, 2013 11:41 pm

It's very appropriate that the recruiting brochure above is signed, "John Gourlay, Executive Director HAPI (also known as Fearless Leader.)

In the old Boris & Natasha cartoons featured on the Rocky & Bullwinkle show, Fearless Leader (on the right, below) was the harsh, ruthless dictator of the fictional communist country Pottsylvania, who was always yelling at the bungling spies for failing at their missions.

Image

According to the Wikipedia entry:
[Pottsylvania] was noted for being a nation dedicated to all matters related to espionage and deceitfulness; children were taught in schools how to commit crimes, for instance, while casual conversations would have double meanings.

Populated entirely by government agents and saboteurs, Pottsylvania is the one nation where the cold war never thawed. Its highest honor was the Double Cross, and its newspaper, The Pottsylvania Eavesdropper, was printed in invisible ink. While many considered Pottsylvania to be a spoof, it was considered offensive by the government of the Soviet Union, which banned Rocky & Bullwinkle as anti-Soviet propaganda.

Pottsylvania's industries, besides espionage, included production of a vehicle called the "Assassin-8". Millions were built despite Pottsylvania having only 12 miles of road.
Let me see...

Espionage and deceitfulness... casual conversations with double meanings... spending lots of money to build things that have nowhere to go.... constantly screaming at underlings...

Yep, sounds just like Scientology to me!

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heyjupiter
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by heyjupiter » Sat Nov 02, 2013 1:07 pm

spacecootie wrote:It's very appropriate that the recruiting brochure above is signed, "John Gourlay, Executive Director HAPI (also known as Fearless Leader.)

In the old Boris & Natasha cartoons featured on the Rocky & Bullwinkle show, Fearless Leader (on the right, below) was the harsh, ruthless dictator of the fictional communist country Pottsylvania, who was always yelling at the bungling spies for failing at their missions.

Image

According to the Wikipedia entry:
[Pottsylvania] was noted for being a nation dedicated to all matters related to espionage and deceitfulness; children were taught in schools how to commit crimes, for instance, while casual conversations would have double meanings.

Populated entirely by government agents and saboteurs, Pottsylvania is the one nation where the cold war never thawed. Its highest honor was the Double Cross, and its newspaper, The Pottsylvania Eavesdropper, was printed in invisible ink. While many considered Pottsylvania to be a spoof, it was considered offensive by the government of the Soviet Union, which banned Rocky & Bullwinkle as anti-Soviet propaganda.

Pottsylvania's industries, besides espionage, included production of a vehicle called the "Assassin-8". Millions were built despite Pottsylvania having only 12 miles of road.
Let me see...

Espionage and deceitfulness... casual conversations with double meanings... spending lots of money to build things that have nowhere to go.... constantly screaming at underlings...

Yep, sounds just like Scientology to me!
Fearless Leader John Gourlay is the rather pathetic looking bloke at the top left of the picture holding his sword with such enthusiasm- not! I doubt we have much to fear from him if we ever encounter him in battle. The rest of the mighty Scots clan are pictured at the bottom- a real fighting force not to be reckoned with. They are generally to be seen hanging around outside looking miserable and smoking. However- I digress. Here is another slogan for $cientology :

OFF WITH THEIR HEADS! - you won't need an independent mind in $cientology- just plenty money and total obedience.

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by Demented LRH » Sat Nov 02, 2013 3:37 pm

Scientology: It was Hubbard's ass talking
“This OT shit is driving me insane. On a positive side, I laugh a lot these days because I’m at a funny farm.”
L. Ron Hubbard

L. Ron Hubbard era un maestro de masturbacion fisica y mental.

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bubbler
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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by bubbler » Fri Nov 08, 2013 1:53 am

Now that was funny.
Thank you for posting sc.

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Re: Suggest A New Scientology Theme Line

Post by secularpatriot » Fri Nov 08, 2013 6:00 pm

"Scientology: We're no more evil than any other religion. Mostly."

"Scientology: No worse than other religions that put rattlesnakes in their former members' mailboxes."

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