Helping a Child

A place to post and debate the Church of Scientology.
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Paul Richens
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Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:19 am

Helping a Child

Post by Paul Richens » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:46 am

Hello everybody, Please let me start by saying I'm new to this site, so if I offend or even step on some rules it is not intentional and I would gladly
accept any assitance to avoid a repeat.
All that aside, I have a real problem, I know of a 7 yr old boy, he has a loving mother(divorced) and loving grandparents.
The "father" is heavily involved in this scam, and at every oportunity is poisoning his little mind, that his mother is bad and evil. Ha.
If anyone out there can help this beautiful innocent child, by giving me some "pointers" or experience, so we may be able to combat or limit the damage done by this dispicable man. He hides behind the religion, it also funds his court cases whereby he has had the mother in court every year
of his sons existance, and has almost destroyed 4 lovely people, both emotionally and financially.
Only just this holidays I witnessed a 7 yr old boy having what looked and sounded like a nervous breakdown.


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Re: Helping a Child

Post by I'mglib » Sun Jan 16, 2011 4:40 am

Hi, Paul, and welcome to the board.

First of all, I moved your question to this board, because the feedback and help section is more for help with the website.

Second, I assume you are talking about Scientology, when you mention "the scam". Scientology is indeed a scam.

It sounds like the boy is with her non-Scientology mother, and his father tries to indoctrinate her whenever he sees him. This gets tricky, because things like that happen when exes have different religions and one tries to impose the beliefs without the other's consent.

I think the biggest thing is that the mother shouldn't trash the father, because that in itself is really damaging for the child. Also, 7 is pretty young to start getting into the details of what's wrong with Scientology.

Maybe the mother should just say, "Your dad has his religion, I have mine, and when you get much older you will be able to weigh all of the information and make your decisions. At 7 you are a bit young to research the truth, and that is what you'll have to do as you get older."

Does the mother know much about Scientology? If not, it would be good if she found out about the beliefs, so she can counteract them with intelligent responses as he gets older.
"A man may build himself a throne of bayonets, but he cannot sit on it." -William Ralph Inge

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Re: Helping a Child

Post by Sponge » Sun Jan 16, 2011 5:34 am

There are charitable organisations which can help a family which is having difficulty due to the influence of pseudo-religious cults like scientology. There are also counsellors which charge fees.

We could find some contact information for appropriate organisations for you but it would help to narrow it down if we knew at least which country you are in.

In the meantime you might want to try reading Steve Hassan's book, Releasing the Bonds, Empowering People to Think for Themselves ... ks/rtb.htm
"Releasing the bonds reveals a much more refined method to help family and friends, called the Strategic Interaction Approach. This non-coercive, completely legal approach is far better than deprogramming, and even exit counseling. Topics covered in depth include: evaluating the situation; interacting with dual identities; communication strategies for phone calls, letter writing and visits; understanding and utilizing cult beliefs and tactics; techniques to reality-test and promote freedom of mind; and planning and implementing effective interventions."

His previous book Combatting Cult Mind Control may also be helpful. ... s/ccmc.htm
Steve Hassan is an exit counsellor and escaped from a cult himself.

Other members of this forum who have more contact with cult information/help groups, some of them ex-scientologists themselves, will hopefully drop in here and advise.

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Re: Helping a Child

Post by lostinspace » Sun Jan 16, 2011 6:25 am

Wow this is a hard one, but Glib is right. I have personal experience with this. Taking the high road with the child is the right thing to do. Take care not to trash Scientology or the father to the child, just say gently its not for me. As the child becomes older maintain the age appropriate principal because sooner or later the child may see south park or hear some comedian make fun of Scientology on TV or even see stuff on the internet. Be prepared to answer questions simply if they do. I feel so badly for the mother. Alienation is a real fear for her and its not healthy for the child. if they have the opportunity, I would also seriously advize get the child to counseling too.

My best wishes to the mother. The help groups out there for this issue do understand how to help her and her child.

Paul Richens
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Joined: Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:19 am

Re: Helping a Child

Post by Paul Richens » Tue Jan 18, 2011 2:42 am

Thank you all for your responses, We will certainly be doing more research, and we are aware that this little mind must be treated carefully.

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