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 Post subject: Why I became a "Knight of Xenu"
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 4:07 am 
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Joined: Thu Mar 25, 2004 4:02 pm
Posts: 8290
Scientology: My Story
by Patrick Jost

This is my "insider's account" of the time I spent in Scientology.I
wrote it because it has been suggested that since I have had no
formal training (not true!) that I should not comment on it.

Background: My father was in advertising, and had HEAVY "show business"
connections. I dabbled in the music business when I was doing some
graduate work at UCLA. A "celebrity" friend of the family had mentioned
Scientology to me several times; I had never been interested in the
talk of engrams and so on, but I WAS interested in claims of increased
intelligence and so on. I read the "standard" bio of Hubbard, and
decided someone with that background might actually have some
useful ideas.

As a result, I was "sponsored" (which means I didn't pay for it) for
some courses and auditing at the Los Angeles Celebrity Centre.

Initially, I found it all very strange and very interesting. I was
very popular with the instructors, as I could do "Dear Alice" and
some of the other procedures in several foreign languages (I'm
a linguist by training and profession).

I was declared a "natural clear" and people started to talk to me
about a possible "position" in the Guardian's (or is it just Guardian?)
Office. To "qualify" for this position, I was given what can best
be described (and I'm fudging this a little to avoid any legal
hassles) as a "crash course" covering New Era Dianetics through
OTIII. I did some solo work, but most of it was with a "tutor"
who, I determined later, was also gently probing me on various
things to determine my suitability for the GO and probably the
Sea Org.

Well, I kept "advancing" but nothing happened. I mentioned this
several times, and was told that by the time I made OT, that
I'd have an IQ of 200 (whatever that means!), perfect recall,
and so on. Yes, on occasion I "believed" I was getting some
results, but would always decide that I wasn't. I was also
hearing stories of "powers" but when I asked for details
or demonstrations ("you can fly!?" "show me!") they
remained stories.

OTIII and events surrounding it were just too much for me. Most
readers of this group will know that OTIII describes events
in the distant past involving alien beings, space travel,
exploding volcanos and so on. I started to object to this
on scientific grounds. I also have a good background in
archaeology, and was asking some VERY pointed questions
about geology, biology, linguistics, and so on.

Initially, I was told that I needed more processing, that
I had some implants that prevented me from "accepting"
the truth; I'd have to do this before my "capabilities"
were "released" or some such thing.

At about this point, my "sponsor" started to hint that
it was time for me to start to pay for my own auditing;
it seems that my "complaining" was reaching some of the
higher levels and someone who had initially been perceived
as a hot recruit was not working out.

I found out the cost; I didn't have that sort of money,
so I approached my father. We had a long talk...he said,
"Let's investigate...what do you know about this man
Hubbard?" I showed him the bio, and he found it incredible;
he (my father) served with distinction in the Pacific, and
just did not accept it. We got copies of Navy records, and
sure enough, no command of a corvette squadron, no long
list of citations, no mention of serious injuries.

The next step was a PI, who checked with George Washington
University and Princeton. Hubbard flunked out of GWU (or
dropped out...) and never attended Princeton. We found
a reference to a Ph.D. from Sequoia University, which was
a degree mill.

I then allowed an electrical engineer to open my E-Meter and
take a look. He explained the Wheatstone Bridge circuit to me,
and I accepted that there is no correlation between resistance
and "mental mass" (whatever that means).

I returned to the Celebrity Centre and had a long talk with
my course supervisor. I told her that I had seen no results...
not personally, not with anyone else. I told her that I now
had serious doubts about Hubbard's background as well as
the effectiveness of the E-Meter. I also repeated my list
of questions about OTIII.

She told me (quite sternly) that I should not investigate
Scientology. She told me that a "high level OT" could
wipe me out with a thought, and that the Church did not
tolerate "snooping around" and the like.

She said that I needed to do "an ethics course" and that
it would not cost me anything. She said that if I didn't
do the course, that I'd be declared an SP and kicked out
of Scientology.

OK, off to ethics. My first encounter was with the "Director
of Communications" of the Celebrity Centre, who also seemed
to be the receptionist. She told me that she had gained the
ability to speak fluent Spanish through auditing. Well,
let me tell you, she could not speak fluent Spanish, in
fact, apart from a few expressions, she knew nothing about
Spanish. She told me that such accusations were "going
to get me into trouble" with the Ethics Officer, who was
a "powerful" person.

Finally...into the inner sanctum of the ethics officer. The
guy was a little runt who wore glasses, squinted and chain
smoked. He told me that I had to stop asking questions, stop
investigating, stop challenging people's claims of abilities,
and so on. He wanted me to sign some forms. I refused. He
produced some paperwork, and said that he'd process me for
"declaration". I said I didn't care. He then told me that
he'd "take care of me" if I kept asking questions. I asked
him what that meant. He said that he would certainly hurt
me, maybe kill me "with his OT powers" if I did not comply
with his demands.

At this point, I had a "cognition": Scientology is RUBBISH. I
told him about my cognition, wished him well, and got up
to leave. He said "you'll never get home...I'll stop you!".

I walked out, he followed me, making all sorts of threats.
I got to my car, and got out my key. He grabbed me. I turned
around, he hit me (not very hard). I said "try that again,
and you'd better be Superman". He did, I blocked it, and
hit him myself. He picked up a board and swung it at me;
I knocked it out of his hands, and hit him a few times
until he fell down.

This altercation had attracted some attention, and someone
had called the police. Within (it seemed) minutes, the parking
lot was full of Scientologists, and two police cars and an had
ambulance had arrived.

I told my version of the story. The EO said I was "a troublemaker
who needed to learn some manners". The police asked if I wanted
to press charges. I said no, I just need to get home. The EO
was taken to the hospital for stitches-he cut his face on
the pavement when he fell (I didn't mean to hurt him, but
hey...a board?!).

A few nights later, I had dinner with my "sponsor"; I didn't
know it when I set up the dinner, but two "representatives"
from the CoS came along as well.

My sponsor didn't get to say more than "hello"; the two
CoS reps told me that I had betrayed my sponsor, the
Church, Hubbard, my fellow Scientologists, and
that I was a criminal. They said I had committed a
"high crime" by attacking the Ethics Officer.

I was told that the ONLY way "out" was to sign up for
the Sea Org-then and there-and promise to pay not only
for all of the services I had received, but for what
I gathered was about two years of additional training
and auditing.

I said that I was not going to join the Sea Org, not
pay them anything, and not stop asking questions. One
of them said "you know, I could kill you right now...
with a thought". I said "well, you know, I've been asking
for demonstrations for a while now, why don't you just
do it and get it over with?"

The reply was something like "don't worry, we'll get
you when we have to".

I said "let me give you some incentive" and poured
a glass of water down the front of her blouse. I
got up and left the restaurant. Yes, I know it was
rude, but I did-and still do-want to see a demonstration
of all these powers that I've heard about and been
threatened with. I figured a little ice water ought
to provoke even an operating thetan into action...

And, surprisingly, that's about it. I got an
"invoice" from them about two months later,
which I ignored.

So let's look at what happened...I got no results
at all, that's important. If "the tech always works"
then something's wrong here. I asked questions, and
was accused of heresy (let's not get into the
results of my research, but I will say that I think
that CoS "history" is a bunch of lies). I was
not only threatened, but attacked.

To me, false claims, no results, and attacks are
not a good combination. The actions of the Church
of Scientology are what has set me against it.

-Patrick Jost


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 5:34 am 
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Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2001 1:12 am
Posts: 3600
Knights of Xenu! Sounds dashing!! Can girls join? 8)


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 5:20 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 5:38 pm
Posts: 1593
Dames of Xenu? The British honor men by making them Knights, and women by making them Dames. Why not?


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 6:11 pm 
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Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2001 1:12 am
Posts: 3600
I dunno, DC. Fine British tradition notwithstanding, it sounds a little "South Pacific" to me.

Humming: "There is nothing like a dame ~~~ nothin' in the world. ~~~ There is nothing you can name that is anything like a dame!"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 8:09 pm 
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Joined: Wed Aug 25, 2004 11:00 am
Posts: 790
The Order of Xenu: Warrior Princess?

XD

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S toboi ostatsa dol'she


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 8:56 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 5:38 pm
Posts: 1593
Hee hee. To keep it symmetrical, you could have
Knights of Xenu and Warrior Princesses of Xenu.

OR:
Enchantresses of Xenu
or
Damsels of Xenu

If you want to go up in rank, you could have Dukes and Duchesses of Xenu.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 19, 2004 9:15 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 26, 2004 5:52 pm
Posts: 911
"She told me (quite sternly) that I should not investigate
Scientology. She told me that a "high level OT" could
wipe me out with a thought, and that the Church did not
tolerate "snooping around" and the like."

ROFLMAO!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 5:08 am 
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Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2004 6:27 pm
Posts: 3690
Don carlo, you left out Queens of Xenu, but I suppose you didn't wish to raise ambiguity where none was needed... :crazy:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 3:27 pm 
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Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 5:38 pm
Posts: 1593
Chortle. If you like ambiguity, one honorific could be Cross-dressers of Xenu.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 4:27 pm 
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Joined: Tue Oct 16, 2001 1:12 am
Posts: 3600
Tee-hee, BG!! Queens of Xenu. :lol:

I'm visualizing a really campy Scn-themed drag show ... sort of a cross between "The Bird Cage" and "Battlefield Earth."

We are fa-mi-ly ~ ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch
Unless you've been declared SP!


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 6:28 pm 
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Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2004 5:07 pm
Posts: 1124
Location: Bucks, UK
'Dame' is also a funny word in the UK, though not because of the 'South Pacific' song.

In England local theatres put on at Christmas a 'pantomime', a uniquely English tradition which is totally incomprehensible to foreigners. One of the features of pantomime is the 'pantomime dame', a man in drag who usually plays the hero's mother. The hero is played by a girl dressed up as... I've lost you already.

Anyway several of our better known older actresses are Dames, Judi Dench for example, though they can't play Dames on stage of course.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Oct 21, 2004 1:50 am 
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Joined: Sat Jan 24, 2004 5:38 pm
Posts: 1593
Chatelaine of Xenu
(means mistress of the castle of Xenu)

Sheriff, Chancellor, Constable of Xenu

Companion, Protector, Herald of Xenu

Marshall, Steward, Defender of Xenu.

Hammer of Xenu
Socket Wrench of Xenu?

Most ideas from Society for Creative Anachronism


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 22, 2004 4:09 am 
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Joined: Wed Aug 25, 2004 11:00 am
Posts: 790
Songbird: how about a cross between Priscilla: Queen of the Desert and Battlefield Earth? Seems a tad more apt since the "queens" of Priscilla had to do their fare share of battle too ;)

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 22, 2004 4:09 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jun 07, 2004 5:32 pm
Posts: 109
Location: New York, NY,
i'm not joining until i can become a 'GODDESS of xenu'
:lol:

dakota


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 22, 2004 5:42 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2004 6:27 pm
Posts: 3690
dakota, Xenu must have been pretty lonely come to think of it. So far as I can ascertain, there Were no gods or goddesses before him or around him at any time. Am I wrong?

Also I'm wondering what it was in his psycho-social history that made him so violent... Any suggestions? Like did his parents beat him or something, were his forebearers into explosives and other violent/antisocial stuff?

Poor Xenu. He has no history. I think the cult could at least come up with some cuddly baby pictures. (Or is there something in OTIII I haven't seen yet?)


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