Lol. I have been pwned by greater minds than my own.

the planet of chug was inhabited by frats.

Ha ha ha ha. No wonder Dave pulls you in all direction at once. If we had completed Chug, I imagine this is what would happen:

It would note the falling income and membership numbers, then look closer and see the incredible rise in activism and negative press. Approximately 2ms later it would be drawing up execution orders for Dave.

Here is a link to some famous quotes from HAL in 2001 A Space Odessy:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0062622/quotes

I have recast the Police Computer as HAL.

Dave puts orders into Chug to have OSA handle me.
CHUG: Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?

Dave explains that I am an SP, a danger to the mission and must be stopped!
CHUG: I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.

Dave waves his tiny fists of fury, demanding Chug handle it:
CHUG: Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.

Eventually the toll of contradictory policy, bat shit insane orders and false data has its effect on Chug.
[sings while slowing down]
CHUG: Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.

The Police Computer would order Miscavige to the RPF. Yes!

Fix'd that for ya ...

Now let me get this straight.

scientology was going to be completely controlled by "MEST"? (Acronym for Matter, Energy, Space, Time).

Start your cognitive dissonance, now!

I knew about Chug. I knew about the drones. I knew about the three-way logic. I was in OSA Int, not INCOMM. I was 2nd on an OSA Int mission (Jayn Baker was I/C) in the late 80s. OSA used "FAST," which was like SIR ("Source Information Retrieval" -- Hubbard's writings) for OSA: It had legal documents and, eventually, PR and intelligence and other data. It stood for something cheesy like Fast Access to Stored Text. It was anything but fast. It was a terrible search engine, even by standards of the time, and OSA needed something better. But nobody outside INCOMM knew the first thing about computers and what could be done with them, and INCOMM was too busy creating Chug to do much for OSA, so Jayn and I were supposed to find out from key FAST users what they would need in a computer system that would actually fulfill their needs. The answers always boiled down to the same thing: "Everything, fast and easy." We joked about it and privately made that the nickname of the OSA computer system we would eventually propose.

Our mission orders required us to read a pack of LRH INCOMM advices, and the approval process ensured that we were granted permission to do so despite not being INCOMM personnel. It wasn't all the advices, but it was a lot of reading, mostly boring stuff, but who could forget the Duke of Chug and the alien spy drones? Hubbard talked about the voltages at which they operate (higher than our primitive Earth computers, enough to hurt you), the fact they are enabled with AI that could pass for human (which Hubbard found unimpressive and of little use), and the fact they (and all space opera computers) use ternary rather than binary logic at all levels of hardware and software.

So -- there you go. Further confirmation. What Jason said about Chug, and that being the entire purpose of INCOMM: Fact.

I love that old song, "Duke of Chug"